No Womb, But a View

I had a hysterectomy on June 5th.

The night before the surgery I sent an email out to my family and closest friends who wanted updates. In that I email I shared that I was worried about the surgery.  The type of surgery I would have was dependent upon the size of my fibroids and whether they could do a “Laparoscopically Assisted Vaginal Hysterectomy.” I didn’t want them to have to make an incision (no matter how small) and asked everyone on the email chain to share my intention that the surgery be done laparoscopically.

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About The Author

Jen Coken's picture

Jen Coken is an author, life coach, and comedian who wants to live in a world where you’re free to be yourself and achieve your soul’s purpose—a vision that has driven her work as a Coach, Speaker, Author, Comedian for more than 20 years.

Drawing on three decades of experience as a non-profit leader and grassroots organizer, Jen helps CEOs and entrepreneurs overcome their self-made limitations and do their heart’s work.

But Jen’s impact doesn’t end there: She spent six years on the Denver stand-up comedy circuit and brings a sense of humor to every topic she addresses, including the experience of coping with her mother's diagnosis and death from ovarian cancer.

Jen’s book, "When I Die, Take My Panties: Turning Your Darkest Moments into Your Greatest Gifts" chronicles that experience and shares Jen’s core message that everything that comes our way is meant to teach us about ourselves.

When she’s not crafting bestselling books or speaking to audiences around the country, you can find Jen eating Nutella by the spoonful in the nearest grocery aisle. www.jencoken.com

How to Stop Being a Control Freak

The desire for control is a form of perfectionism, and we can alleviate it by learning to embrace uncertainty.

Last autumn, horrific wildfires raged near our home. People we knew were losing their houses left and right. In the midst of disaster, I had to leave town for work.

To make myself feel better, I typed up three single-spaced pages of detailed instructions for what my family should do in case of fire or earthquake. Which I then laminated. And posted in each of my kids’ bedrooms.

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About The Author

Greater Good Science Center's picture

This article originally appeared on Greater Good, the online magazine of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley.

The Greater Good Science Center studies the psychology, sociology, and neuroscience of well-being, and teaches skills that foster a thriving, resilient, and compassionate society.

Based at the University of California, Berkeley, the GGSC is unique in its commitment to both science and practice: Not only do we sponsor groundbreaking scientific research into social and emotional well-being, we help people apply this research to their personal and professional lives. Since 2001, we have been at the fore of a new scientific movement to explore the roots of happy and compassionate individuals, strong social bonds, and altruistic behavior—the science of a meaningful life. And we have been without peer in our award-winning efforts to translate and disseminate this science to the public.

Give Up Being a Perfectionist

How many times have you NOT finished something because you didn’t get it perfect?

You heard it had to be done a specific way, but you just didn’t do it that way, so obviously it wasn’t done the right way, so what is the point?

Do you know how exhausting that is?

Have you ever wondered how much energy and time you were wasting trying to get something to be perfect?

What is perfect, anyway?

Usually, some way OTHER than the way we are doing it.

Give yourself a break.

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About The Author

Terry Monaghan's picture

Terry is the CEO of Time Triage

With over 30 years of business and entrepreneurial experience, Terry’s unique technology has dramatically increased the productivity of Fortune 100 executives and entrepreneurs in a variety of industries. Whether it’s a corporate executive or a “solo-preneur,” the outcome of Terry’s methodology will give you an expanded level of freedom and productivity with results you can measure.

Terry’s clients find themselves working on what is most fulfilling and what really matters in moving things forward rather than what they previously thought they “had to do.” The things you hoped to get to someday become the things you work on today.

Terry’s work was recently featured in the New York Times best-seller Overwhelmed: Work, Love and Play When No One Has The Time by Brigid Schulte (Sarah Crichton Books, March 11, 2014).

Eliminating overwhelm, giving clients more time to focus and clarity about where to focus, and implementing what it takes to produce results beyond what is predictable are what Terry’s efforts are all about. Her high integrity, no-nonsense, practical approach to business operations has helped build trusted relationships with many high performing professionals, entrepreneurs, and executives.

Don't Be Afraid to Get a C

Some years ago I was suffering from some fairly extreme anxiety.

One of the ways the anxiety manifested was that I felt like I was being constantly graded.

During every meal I cooked, every parallel-parking job, every audition, every everything, I felt like someone, somewhere, was monitoring my every move and keeping track in a big notebook about how well or, more often, how poorly I was executing my life.

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About The Author

Samantha Bennett's picture

Originally from Chicago, Samantha Bennett is a writer, speaker, teacher, and creativity/productivity specialist and the author of the bestselling "Get It Done: From Procrastination to Creative Genius in 15 Minutes a Day" (New World Library)

She is the creator of www.TheOrganizedArtistCompany.com and www.TheOrganizedEntrepreneurCompany.com, both organizations dedicated to helping creative people get unstuck, especially by helping them focus and move forward on their goals.

Now based in a tiny beach town outside of Los Angeles, Bennett offers her revolutionary online workshops to overwhelmed procrastinators, frustrated overachievers, and recovering perfectionists everywhere.

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Computer and coffee cup on table in front of window with amazing mountain view
09/17/2018
I had a hysterectomy on June 5th. The night before the surgery I sent an email out to my family and closest friends who wanted updates. In that I email I shared that I was worried about the... read more
Perfectly aligned desk supplies on white desktop
09/04/2018
The desire for control is a form of perfectionism, and we can alleviate it by learning to embrace uncertainty. Last autumn, horrific wildfires raged near our home. People we knew were losing their... read more
Black and white of crumpled paper and pen on table.
09/18/2016
How many times have you NOT finished something because you didn’t get it perfect? You heard it had to be done a specific way, but you just didn’t do it that way, so obviously it wasn’t done the... read more
several versions of the letter C
08/10/2015
Some years ago I was suffering from some fairly extreme anxiety. One of the ways the anxiety manifested was that I felt like I was being constantly graded. During every meal I cooked, every... read more
Computer and coffee cup on table in front of window with amazing mountain view
09/17/2018
I had a hysterectomy on June 5th. The night before the surgery I sent an email out to my family and closest friends who wanted updates. In that I email I shared that I was worried about the... read more
Perfectly aligned desk supplies on white desktop
09/04/2018
The desire for control is a form of perfectionism, and we can alleviate it by learning to embrace uncertainty. Last autumn, horrific wildfires raged near our home. People we knew were losing their... read more
Black and white of crumpled paper and pen on table.
09/18/2016
How many times have you NOT finished something because you didn’t get it perfect? You heard it had to be done a specific way, but you just didn’t do it that way, so obviously it wasn’t done the... read more
several versions of the letter C
08/10/2015
Some years ago I was suffering from some fairly extreme anxiety. One of the ways the anxiety manifested was that I felt like I was being constantly graded. During every meal I cooked, every... read more